ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize