Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
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