i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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