we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
