the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
