the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize
