Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
