It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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