Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
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