He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize