Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
I party with great urgency now.
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