Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize