Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
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