THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
I enjoy the company of your penis
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