Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Randomize
