I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
