Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
