Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
