this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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