It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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