You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
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