I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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