I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
