I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
