when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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