Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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