His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize