it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
they need to just BURY HIM!
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Randomize
