Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
