if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE