"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
operation harelip BJ is a go
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.