You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I currently don't understand fingers.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
