I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
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