i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Randomize
