But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
