At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
