I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
her vagine was all disorganized.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
This is the high leading the old right now
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize