my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
