I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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