and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
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SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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