i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
