We're facebook friends in real life
In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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