Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
