this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
