OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
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Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
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Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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