maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
