It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
