True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
then he tried to convert me to islam
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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