GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
