i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
