what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Randomize
