Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
as a side note pls kill me
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