wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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