Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Randomize
